love and some verses
by bravevulnerability
Summary: 'She looks up to scan the crowd, to quell the tears that threatened to build at the edges of her eyelids, when she sees the flash. A distinct flash of light flickering behind he headstones. Aimed at her partner.' AU for 3x24 (Knockout). A collection of unrelated oneshots.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **Most of these have been previously published on my tumblr and were recently requested to be shared here as well, so for those of you who may have already read these little pieces of stories via tumblr, I hope you don't mind seeing them again and for those who have yet to come across them, I hope you can enjoy them.

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><p><em><strong><em>Set immediately after 2x14 (The Third Man)<em>**_

_Prompt: Drunk Beckett_

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><p>Dinner at Remy's was fun. In the beginning of their forced partnership, she had barely been able to stand him, but over the last year, Castle had witnessed a progressive descent of the guard Beckett kept up around him. She had slowly started to allow him inside her life, slowly started to see him as less of a nuisance and more of a friend.<p>

Tonight was one of those nights. She smiled and laughed and acted as if spending an evening with him was something she actually enjoyed and he wished it could always be like this.

After burgers and fries - and milkshakes that she made sinful little noises over - she surprised him when she asked if they could continue the night at a bar in East Village. It surprised him even more when she ended up drinking quite a few glasses of a whiskey he recommended.

"Well, look who's off duty," he commented with a smirk, still nursing only his third glass of the amber liquid.

She rolled her eyes, but her lips were lifting behind the rim of her gleaming shot glass.

"I'm not all work, Castle," she murmured, and was that seduction he heard in her voice? He wasn't completely sober, so he couldn't be sure, but he could still see clearly and her eyes had definitely grown darker over the last hour.

The barstools they had acquired were pushed close together, her knees pressed between his, but he still never would have expected the slide of her hand onto his knee, the slow spread of her fingers over his thigh. He caught her fingers before they could wander and she didn't jerk her hand free.

He glanced up, saw the lazy smile stretching across her lips. and yeah, Kate Beckett was unquestionably drunk.

She downed the remnants of her shot and made an unsteady dismount from the wooden stool, nearly crashing into him. But he caught her hips, held her in place, and Kate closed her fingers around his wrists, tugged him with her when she began walking backwards.

"C'mon, _Cassstle_, walk me home."

He grinned. "That would imply that this was a date, _Beckett_," he pointed out, purposely popping the t's at the end of her name.

"Then maybe I'll kiss you if we make it to my door."

She gave him one of her flirty smiles, one he had seen her use on suspects before when she was trying to play the good cop, one with her enticing tongue pressing against the whites of her teeth. He wanted that smile covering his.

He held her hand to keep her from stumbling after he left a tip that would cover them both on the bar, let her lean on him as they both exited the establishment and ventured onto the street. The walk to her apartment was long and swaying and when they finally reached her building, he wasn't exactly positive she would make it up to her apartment without taking a tumble.

"We should have gone dancing," she sighed, her arms suddenly around his neck, her body tilting slowly from side to side.

His hands settled at her waist, thumbs skimming the edge of her shirt. "Instead of Remy's?"

She shook her head back and forth, dislodging a few strands from the tasteful bun she had scraped her hair into after they had returned from their failed dates with other people.

"Instead of Drago. I liked my dress, felt like a waste to wear it for that stupid date," she sighed, dipping her head to his shoulder.

"It wasn't a waste," he assured her, rubbing her back. "I really like you in red, Beckett."

She laughed, a little too loudly, but picked her head up.

"You think I'm pretty?" she teased, but he nodded as he tucked a strand of her falling hair behind her ear.

"You're always pretty. Beautiful."

Her eyes were hazy, but they brightened at his words, sparkling specks of gold shining through the sea of green and brown. He had never seen her so open and he wished it was due to more than the alcohol.

"You drunk, Castle?"

"Not as drunk as you," he chuckled and she huffed as he tried to steer her closer to the door, made a disapproving noise in the back of her throat.

"Stop trying to _herd _me into my apartment."

"It's late, Beckett. You've got paperwork to do in the morning," he tried to reason, but she only listed further into him, a frown creasing her lips as she stared up at him.

"I wanted to kiss you."

His heart stuttered, even though it shouldn't. He should direct her towards the entrance of her building, maybe walk her up, and then he should leave. He didn't want to, but he wouldn't take advantage of her, share a pivotal moment with her that she wouldn't even remember in the morning.

"You need to go inside, Kate."

She smiled, brighter than he had ever seen. "I like when you call me Kate. Sounds nice when you say it."

"I think you'll feel differently when you're sober."

"Hmm, yeah. Gotta keep it professional. But for now…"

Kate smudged her mouth over his before he could comprehend what she was doing, before he could stop her. He cradled her head, submerged his fingers into the soft locks of hair, finally sending the precarious remains of her bun unraveling. It wasn't the most graceful of kisses, it was a little sloppy and slightly breathless, but it still made his blood sing.

She pulled away with a dazed grin, so not Beckett, but a glimmer of what a regular occurrence of kissing Kate could be like.

"We should have done that sooner," she sighed wistfully, squeezing his fingers before she stepped back and began the hazardous trek to the building's entrance a few feet away.

"Hopefully we can do it again."

She used the doorjamb to steady herself when she glanced over her shoulder. "I'd bet on it, Castle."

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><p>He didn't bring it up the next day, but when he walked into the precinct and placed her grande vanilla latte on her desk, she offered him a hint of that same bright smile she had given him last night. And he knew she remembered.<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

_Prompt: Kate is marrying someone else. Castle crashes the wedding._

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><p>This was a mistake, she could feel it in her bones.<p>

She was preparing in the back room of the church, uncertainty under the disguise of common nerves swirling around in her stomach as she slid her hands over the tulle skirt of her dress. She should be more excited, more… _giddy_. Tom was a great guy, so kind and understanding. It was never complicated between them, but it was never raw or passionate either and part of her wanted that. Needed that burning sensation of _feeling_.

But no, no this was the right decision. She had said yes for a reason. Tom was safe, he was comfortable, he was reliable. He was ordinary.

Too lost in thought (and honestly panic), she didn't hear the door open, didn't hear the sharp intake of breath from across the room. It wasn't until she glanced up to examine herself critically in the mirror once more that she saw the figure behind her.

"You're beautiful."

Kate spun around, her jaw falling as she identified the man in the doorway.

"Castle?" she whispered in disbelief. She hadn't seen him since he had accepted the offer to write a certain British spy, since he had left her after their final case and given her an impersonal handshake for a goodbye. That had been two years ago. "What're you doing here?"

He slipped the invitation from inside of his suit jacket, waved it at her with one hand as he soundlessly shut the door with the other. "You invited me."

She shook her head, rubbing her fingers at her temple. "But I didn't think you would actually - why are you in _here?"_

His eyes were stuck on her, roaming ceaselessly from her head to her toe, taking in every inch, his gaze mournful but bright and sparkling with awe and a crackling hint of desire.

"I feel like it's so cliche, standing up when the pastor does the whole 'speak now' thing. Plus, I didn't want to make a scene," he explained, shrugging his shoulders as he drifted closer.

"What - why would you even-"

"Kate," he started solemnly, finally reaching her and laying a delicate hand along her cheek, the stiff fingers relaxing when she let him because her heart was thundering in her chest, straining against the cage of her ribs for him in a way she couldn't help. "I know this is the wrong time, I know that I should have come back sooner, should have done this so much sooner." He swallowed thickly, his eyes begging with her to just hear him out, and for a moment it baffled her that even after two years of his absence - two years of missing him and hating him and wishing he would just _come back _- it felt like no time had passed. Like they were just picking up from where they had left off. "But I can't let you marry someone else. Not when - not when I still want you so much."

"Still?" she uttered, and it was the wrong thing to say. She should be furious, throwing her fists to his chest and shoving him away from her, but she couldn't will herself to turn him away.

They had always had horrible communication skills, always holding back words or speaking in subtext. Maybe she still partially blamed herself for letting him walk away when she should have told him to stay with the NYPD, with Nikki Heat, with her. Maybe he deserved this moment to explain.

Encouraged by the fact that she hadn't rejected him, Castle nodded earnestly, cradling her face in both hands now and she tentatively clutched at the open ends of his blazer, held onto him.

"Taking that deal, giving up Nikki Heat - biggest mistake I've ever made. A day hasn't gone by where I don't wish I could go back, and then when I got that wedding invitation… Please, I know I have no right-"

Kate lifted on her toes, experimentally brushed her lips along his and sighed in content when he hesitantly tilted into her, fit his mouth to hers. Castle's hands traveled into her hair, upsetting the neatly pinned curls, causing strands to unravel from the careful bun at her neck as he curled his fingers and sucked on her lower lip.

She moaned softly, laced her arms around his neck and slipped her tongue past his lips, tasting the longing that had been repressed for so long and feeling her body come alive in a way it never had for anyone else, including her current fiancé.

"Katie? Are you-"

Kate stumbled away from him, nearly toppling over the edges of her dress, but Castle caught her around the waist and sucked in his breath at the sight of her father in the doorway.

"Mr. Castle, nice to finally meet you," Jim said with the hint of a smirk at the corner of his mouth. "Wish it was under better circumstances."

"Me too, sir," Castle mumbled, reluctantly drawing his hands away from Kate and her body immediately mourned the loss of contact.

"Dad," she sighed, but he held up a hand, shut the door to refrain from exposing them to any of her other guests.

"Should I tell everyone the wedding is off?" he questioned with a quirk of his eyebrows, but Kate's creased in gentle confusion.

"You're not - mad?"

Jim chuckled and strode across the room, placed one hand on her shoulder. "Katie, I can't be angry at you for following your heart. Tom is… I like Tom, he's nice, but I think we both know you were settling."

Kate chewed on her lip, but nodded, stole her father's hand from her shoulder and squeezed in appreciation.

"Would you mind getting him for me? I need to tell him, that the wedding is off."

Jim nodded, patted Castle on the back before giving him a warning glance. Castle had never met her father, but she had spoken of the author enough that her dad probably felt he knew him. He definitely knew how she felt about him and he didn't want her hurt again.

"Suggest you make yourself scarce for this part."

"I will," Castle nodded quickly, but looked to Kate first as Jim slipped out of the room. "Are we-"

"Wait for me," she murmured, placing her hands on his chest, one over the violent pounding of his heart. "I have to explain myself, but then…"

"Then?"

"I'll meet you outside, and we'll see. Just wait for me?"

He leant down to kiss her once more, tender and promising. "Always."

As he strolled out of the room with a small, irrepressible smile on his lips, she felt her lungs expand, air finally filling her without struggle.

It could be a mistake, giving up the safety net of her comfortable, easy life with Tom, but she had never been one to take the easy way. Not in life, not in love. She would talk to Tom, it had been over for a while and she would try to explain without bringing Castle into it, and hopefully let him down without eliciting too much heartache. And then she would escape the suffocating church, find Castle and figure out where they would go from here.

It wouldn't be an easy path; it would probably be painful and difficult at times, but it would also be worth it. They could be extraordinary together.


	3. Chapter 3

_Prompt: Castle and Beckett meet for the first time in 4x07, when she rescues him from the bank._

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><p>Under normal circumstances, she would not be responding to a bank robbery. The place isn't even in their jurisdiction, but she had seen the flashing lights, the slew of squad cars, and the daunting police van parked outside of the New Amsterdam Bank and Trust on her drive to the precinct, and she couldn't resist stopping.<p>

She's already called Ryan and Esposito, filled them in on what was going on, and they were currently covering for her while she stepped out of her cruiser and approached a group of officers on the scene.

"Some civilian called it in before the robbers took his phone," one man explains to her. "Apparently, there's four robbers and-"

"We need a paramedic to go in," a man with a headset cuts in from the police van a few feet away. "One of the hostages is epileptic, having a seizure, and they're allowing him to be escorted out."

"I'll go," Kate volunteers before she can think better of it.

The balding man turns his eyes to her, looks her up and down, and then narrows his gaze.

"Lady, you do not look like one of the paramedics I have on scene here."

"I'm not, but I'm a cop. And no offense to those you have on hand, but I could probably scope the place out better, get a greater idea of what exactly you're up against." It's weak, and impulsive, but it's not a lie either. She's here, she might as well help.

Rick glances up at the sound of the opening doors, sees a gorgeous woman in a paramedics uniform wheeling in a gurney. She looks up once the doors seal shut behind her, meets his eye, and offers him a subtle nod as the female of the four person clan searches her.

This woman is his only chance to get a message to the outside world, and she seems capable of doing more than merely helping Sal Martino, so he snatches a piece of paper from a nearby table while the group of robbers aren't paying attention to him.

"How's he doing?" she asks once she's made her way over to them and is leaning over Sal.

"Not good," he answers, gaze flickering down to Sal and the terror in his eyes. "He has epilepsy and he's suffering a seizure brought on by stress."

She speaks calmly to Sal, tries to slow his frantic breathing with soothing words. Castle has his hand on the man's chest in support and he glances up when the woman covers his knuckles, squeezes his fingers, and meets his eyes with a promise in hers.

Her words are directed at Sal when she says them. "I'm going to get you out of here." But she holds his gaze and accepts the slip of paper he presses against her palm.

Castle helps the paramedic ease Sal up from the ground when the second in command shouts at them to speed things along, helps her guide him onto the gurney and strap him in, and as the nameless woman wheels him away, out into safety, she looks over his shoulder one last time, gives him that same promise with her eyes.

She gives him hope.

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><p>Kate searches for him once they enter the building, but she refrains from calling out his name. Because of course she recognized him the moment she saw him. And she really hopes he isn't dead, especially for the sake of the frantic, young redhead she met outside.<p>

They find the group of hostages in an unlocked vault in the back. He smiles when he spots her through the steel bars and the clouds of dust, and waves.

The SWAT team goes to work at untying everyone, but she takes the time to kneel in front of him, smiling back in greeting.

"How are you?" she asks as she cuts the plastic binding from his wrists.

He looks a little dazed, his wide blue eyes sparkling as he stares up at her, and she thoughtlessly smooths the collar of his shirt down with her thumb.

That seems to snap him out of it.

"I'm - I'm good now, thanks."

They share a second and another smile before the older woman next to him with familiar red hair lifts her wrists. "He's not the only one here, you know," she chuckles and Kate hastily moves away from Richard Castle to free the woman beside him.

"I'm Rick," he says as she cuts the binding from the woman's wrists. "And that's my mother."

"Martha Rodgers," his mother adds with an appreciative nod.

"I'm B- Kate," she corrects, offering a hand to his mother and helping her to her feet while Rick pushes up from the wall.

The three of them walk out together, escorting a pregnant employee along with them. The redhead - Alexis, she hears him say - runs to meet them, throwing herself into her father's arms and tugging her grandmother into the embrace as well. She finds Kate from her place between them, gives her a grateful smile.

Kate slowly disappears from the scene, drifting over to her parked vehicle down the sidewalk once she's sure the officers that belong there have things under control. She should probably call in to work and try to explain why she failed to show up…

"Hey, Kate."

She turns to see Richard Castle jogging after her.

"You're leaving?"

She nods. "I was. Is something wrong?"

"No, no, I just… well, I wanted to ask if you'd like to come to my loft in a couple of hours. My mother's making a huge, celebratory feast tonight and I'd - it'd be nice if you could come." He shifts from foot to foot, as if he's nervous, or maybe just feeling the high of surviving a hostage situation. Yeah, the latter is much more probable. "We also kind of owe you."

"You don't owe me anything," she assures him quickly. "I was just trying to help, like everyone else here."

He shrugs. "You still played a part in saving my life, so allow me to feed you in return."

She chuckles, tucks a strand of hair that's escaped her bun behind her ear. "Okay. Let me just call my boss, explain what's happened."

His brow furrows. "Wouldn't your boss already know?"

"Oh, no. I'm not really a paramedic. I'm a homicide detective. Like I said, I was just helping out."

His eyes light up.

"That's so cool."

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><p>Having Kate Beckett over makes their family dinner one of the most pleasant he's ever experienced. His mother fawns over her, calling her every flattering adjective she can come up with, and his daughter, though far more subtle, seems to share the approval, offering the detective genuine smiles throughout their meal. And he quickly learns that he likes Kate, a lot.<p>

She's smart, funny, and quite inspiring as well. Fascinating really. Her mere presence tempts him to give writing another shot. But best of all, she's sincere. She isn't putting on an act for him or his family, she's genuine in her actions, in her words, and he hasn't come across a woman that's actually held his interest by simply being herself in such a long time.

Both his mother and daughter decide to turn in at the same time after dinner - not conspicuous _at all. _They each hug him for a moment too long, reminding him and themselves that their little family is okay, and murmur their thanks to Kate once again before wishing wish them both a good night and disappearing up the stairs arm in arm.

And then he's left alone with the beautiful detective that saved his life.

"I should go," she sighs, glancing to the door, but he intercepts her gaze.

"Are you sure? I could make you some coffee, to clear the wine from your system?"

She contemplates the idea for a moment. She's only had two glasses, and she seems completely capable of getting herself home, but he has a feeling Kate doesn't want to leave just yet either. "I did drive here…"

"It's settled then. I can't allow you to leave the premises until you've sobered up," he announces as he heads for the espresso machine in his kitchen.

She rolls her eyes, but there's a smile teasing along her lips as she follows him.

The smell of brewing coffee filters through the air, and he knows it's too soon, can tell just from looking at her that she's not one to kiss on first dates. She plays hard to get, he can feel it, but that doesn't stop him from drifting towards her.

Perhaps it's the after effect of facing death that gives him the courage to approach her, to seize the moment while it's there, but Kate doesn't move away when he's standing in front of her, grazing his eyes over her mouth and sliding a tentative hand along her waist.

"Kate?"

"Hmm?"

"Would it be okay if I kissed you?"

The kaleidoscope of colors that consume her eyes brighten, the flecks of gold scattered throughout her irises shining, and she bites her bottom lip as she nods.

He cups the back of her head with one hand, cradles her jaw in the other, smoothing his thumb over the defined line of bone, and lowers his mouth to hers, kissing her softly, slowly. Her hands rise to his ribs, fingers curling into his shirt and drawing him closer as she kisses him back in the middle of his kitchen.

He moans at the stroke of her tongue, the sour burst of wine and the warm press of her body as she lifts on her toes to get closer. It's tender and wanting and wonderful all at once and he doesn't want this to end.

But then the coffee machine gurgles and hisses behind them, and he reluctantly pulls away, drops his forehead to hers even as he hears her cup overflowing.

"Wow," he breathes, panting. "That was amazing."

She bites her bottom lip again, a maddening habit, and grins.

"It was."

"Can we… is this-"

Kate silences him with the glorious press of her mouth once more, coiling her fingers around his ear and listing into him. He bands an arm around her back, holds her close through the heated brush of her lips.

"I'll give you my number and we'll see where this goes, okay?" she murmurs against his mouth, smiling softly as her thumb circles around his earlobe.

He nods as he dusts his lips over her forehead, inhales the sweet scent of cherries and burnt coffee while his heart beats wild with excitement. He never knew something so incredible could come from a near death experience, but Kate Beckett stands as his proof. There's always a possibility for joy.


	4. Chapter 4

_Prompt: Castle doesn't return to the precinct during Rise. The next time Beckett sees him is during 4x07._

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><p>She's surprised when his daughter's name appears on the screen of her phone, but it's quickly followed by the swamping sensation of dread. Kate hesitates, fingers hovering over the device in unease before she sucks in a breath and pulls the phone to her ear.<p>

"Hello?" she answers, a little more timid than she would normally allow, but his daughter is calling her after she hasn't talked to him in months? Can't be good.

"Kate," the girl practically sobs and Beckett's hands clench around the edge of her desk. "Kate, they're in there. They're hostages and there's robbers and they're going to - they-"

"Wait, Alexis, hold on a second," Kate attempts in a soothing tone, trying to remain calm despite the overwhelming pound of her heart and the deafening rush of blood in her ears. "Tell me what's going on."

"My dad and Gram," she chokes as Kate pushes back from her desk, grabs her coat from the back of her chair. She signals to Ryan and Esposito _cover for me _and strides to the elevator. "They went to the bank and now they're being held hostage. I don't know what you can do, but - but you have to get down here, Kate. _Please_."

"I'm already on my way," she promises. "What's the address?"

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><p>Alexis is a beacon of red flashing around the scene, flittering from officer to officer, until she sees her.<p>

"Detective Beckett," she shouts as she races over. "Make them _do _something! They're all just standing here-"

"Alexis, listen to me," Kate murmurs, grabbing the not so young girl by the shoulders to still her. "They're probably doing what they can. Hostage situations are fragile. If they make one wrong move, upset the bad guys in there in any way, it could be fatal for your dad and Martha."

Alexis' eyes glisten, angry and hurt and scared, but she deflates under Kate's hands. "They're all I've got, do you understand that?" she rasps. "You may not care about him, but I-"

"No," Kate croaks, squeezing her shoulders. "I do, I care about him, so much, but I thought - when he didn't come back, I thought it was for the best," she confesses under the scrutiny of his daughter's gaze. "I wanted him safe, and he's safest without me."

"And miserable," she mutters before a new wave of panic suddenly washes over her. "He can't die heartbroken, Kate. He's been so broken for months, he can't-"

"When your father and grandmother come out of that bank alive, we'll fix all of this, okay? For now-"

The earth shakes beneath their feet, the force of the explosion sending both women stumbling. Alexis spins around first, screaming as the building billows with smoke and dust.

Kate grabs the nearest officer. "Stay with her," she commands as she rushes forward, grabbing a spare bulletproof vest she spots resting on the hood of a car and strapping it on.

She doesn't blend in with the SWAT group rushing in, but if anyone notices, they don't dare say.

"Castle!" she yells, coughing around the dust and debris clouding the air and burning her eyes. "Castle!"

"Beckett?" She hears the shout of his voice reply, confusion lacing her name, and she hurries towards the sound of his voice.

His brow furrows when he sees her through the bars of the vault shielding him and the rest of the hostages. Smiling uncertainly, he waves his fingers at her.

She rushes past the SWAT team and pushes through the unlocked doors, tripping over chunks of rubble until she finally reaches him.

The fall to her knees isn't graceful and she feels the concrete flooring bruise her bones, but it doesn't matter. He's alive and she hasn't seen him since the day she lied to him from her hospital bed, rejected him from her life and remained too cowardly to ask him back.

God, she's missed him.

Kate uses her pocket knife to cut the plastic bindings from his wrists and before he can speak, before he can even try to understand her unexpected presence, she surges forward, cups his face in her palms, and kisses him.

Castle stiffens in surprise, his lips still under hers, but then his arms come around her back, hugging her to his chest, and his lips curve upwards against hers.

"I'm so sorry, Castle," she whispers, tilting her forehead to his and stroking her thumbs along the corners of his mouth. "I'm so sorry for everything."

His hands span the blades of her shoulders, travel up to curl around her neck, and he looks up at her with hesitance, but there's tentative hope too. Even a hint of the love he had confessed to her all those months ago while she was bleeding out in his arms. It's still there, hiding in his eyes, waiting to come out. "Talk about it later?"

"Yes, later when you come over for the marvelous dinner I intend to cook if you would kindly untie me, dear," Martha chimes in.

Kate jerks back, offering Martha an apologetic look, but the older woman shakes her head, a soft smile on her lips as she holds out her hands for Kate to free her.

"It's good to have you back, kiddo."

Kate smiles back, helps both Castle and his mother to their feet.

All of the hostages are being escorted out of the vault, to the exit with the help of the attending team, but Castle holds her back at the last second.

"Kate."

She doesn't want to keep him from his daughter, hates the thought of her waiting outside unknowing and terrified, but Kate gives herself just a moment to wrap her arms around his neck, bury her nose in the distinct and comforting scent of him underneath the stench of smoke and wreckage. She has a lot to make up for, a lot to explain, but as Castle cradles her body to his and whispers his lips over her cheek, she has hope that they can make it, that they can fix what she broke.

Kate brushes a final kiss to his jaw before finding one of his hands, lacing their fingers as she begins leading him out of the ruins and into the light.


	5. Chapter 5

_Prompt: Castle leaves with Gina to the Hamptons but keeps their relationship platonic. During his interrogation in 3x01, Beckett is taken aback by that._

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><p>"Were you sleeping with her?" The question tumbles out of her mouth with less elegance than she would have preferred, the words clipped and tainted with a jealousy she can't stand to possess. But it's been a familiar acquaintance over the last few months.<p>

And of course Castle picks up on it immediately, cocking his head to the side and quirking an eyebrow in unhidden amusement.

"How is that relevant?"

"Motive."

"Ah." He nods, but his eyes are still glimmering with mirth. "No. I wasn't sleeping with her."

"Are you sure? Beautiful woman…"

"You know, Beckett," he muses, propping his elbows on the table and leaning in. "You sound kinda jealous. Not a fan of me being with another woman?"

"Jealous?" she scoffs, rolling her eyes for good measure. "Of you dating your second ex-wife and publisher? Tell me, does she make you do everything on a deadline?

Castle's eyebrows rocket to his hairline. "You think I'm dating Gina?"

Kate's mouth falls open, but she doesn't have a response. He had walked away with Gina three months ago, his arm around his ex-wife, and the implication that she would be on top of him in more ways than one hanging in the stale air.

Castle shakes his head, incredulous. "Beck - Kate, Gina came to the Hamptons with me as my publisher. To make sure I actually did my job. Nothing more. And she left after a week."

The flush of embarrassment consumes her neck, crawls up to her cheeks, burns the tips of her ears.

Castle's relaxed brow creases then, scrutinizing. "Why do you care in the first place? You've got Demming," he mutters, plopping back in his seat and crossing his arms like a pouting child.

She's the one to lean forward this time, forgetting all about the interrogation, the boys behind the mirror, and thinking only of Castle, of missed opportunities and misinterpretations. And the possibility of a second chance.

"No, I don't," she says quietly, gaining his attention with ease.

"You… broke up?" he asks, hesitant, as if he doesn't want to put much hope in the idea, not just yet.

Kate swallows, knowing that what she says next could change everything.

"We-"

The door swings open and Kate swivels in her seat, sees Montgomery in the doorway, looking less than pleased.

"Beckett," he summons. "A word."

She receives a light lecture on her lack of professionalism in the box, but her captain doesn't reprimand her for it, a spark of understanding in his gaze as he speaks. Roy is aware of the hurt she felt when Castle walked away from her with Gina, unknowingly breaking her unguarded heart; the entire precinct's been aware, even though she hadn't voluntarily allowed her feelings to show. Her captain is on her side, but that doesn't mean he wouldn't support the two of them working things out.

So after he shows her the ballistics, proves Castle could not have been the shooter, and offers to lock the writer in a holding cell out of spite, Kate retrieves Castle from interrogation and asks him the same question she had three months ago.

"You got a minute?" she murmurs after he's grabbed his coat from the back of his chair and joined her in the doorway.

He smiles, tentative and hopeful. "Of course."

Beckett leads him to the break room, shuts the door and checks the blinds once they're both inside. She fiddles with the old coffeemaker while he waits on her, not touching the expresso machine. She hasn't used the fancy contraption since he left.

"Beckett?"

"I broke up with him," she admits on an exhale. "A few hours before you left for the Hamptons with Gina, I - I told him he wasn't what I was looking for."

She has her eyes fixed on her hands, and when Castle doesn't speak, she glances up, sees him watching her in stunned silence. But once she meets his wide eyes, he jerks forward, nearly tripping over his own feet to get closer.

"What were you looking for?" he asks, his voice alight with eagerness, with hope and a dash of trepidation.

She lowers her gaze again, but Castle surprises her, skims gentle fingers along her jaw, positioning them under her chin and easing her face upwards.

"What are you looking for, Kate?"

The soft timbre of his voice draws her in, has her stepping up close and brushing experimental hands up his arms to rest upon his shoulders. She wasn't sure of what she was looking for in the summer, had no idea by the fall, but she thinks she knows now.

Her eyes flutter from the shimmering pools of his irises to his lips.

If she's learned anything, it's that she doesn't want to miss another chance, not with him.

"I think I was looking for you," she murmurs, trailing one of her hands up to curve around his neck.

His entire face brightens, surprise and wonder consuming his features, and she smiles as she presses gentle lips to his.

Castle sighs in contentment as he wraps his arms around her waist, cradling her body close as he kisses her back, keeping it chaste so he can pull away too soon.

"I'm sorry I didn't let you finish that day," he whispers, shaking his head as if he's berating himself. "I was jealous of Demming and I didn't listen to you-"

"No, shh," she murmurs, lifting her hand to his cheek, tracing his bottom lip with her thumb. "I should have told you sooner," she confesses, shrugging the shoulders beneath his palms. "But it doesn't matter anymore."

He kisses her again, deep and eager and oh so good. His tongue sweeps past her lips, dips inside to taste and tease, and she moans, slides her hands in his hair to tug him closer-

"Uh, guys?"

Kate jerks, but doesn't move from the circle of Castle's arms when they both turn to see Ryan blushing furiously in the cracked doorway.

"I'm really sorry, but Beckett, we have to go."

She nods, glancing back to Castle regretfully, but he's still smiling at her, warm and wide.

"We'll give you another minute, but um, congratulations!" Ryan gives them two thumbs up and quickly slips out of the room.

Kate buries her grin in Castle's shoulder while he chuckles, his chest vibrating with the laughter as he rubs her back.

"Hey, did you want to come?" she asks, lifting her head to look up at him, finding herself really hoping he'll say yes.

His brow rises in delighted surprise. "You want me back on the team?"

She nods. "I want you with me."

"Oh, Beckett. I've made you soft."

She smacks his arm and steps out of his embrace, missing the sizzling warmth of the contact instantly, but stealing his hand as she leads him towards the door. His fingers fit so well with hers.

"C'mon, Partner." She smirks at him over her shoulder. "The sooner we solve this case, the sooner you can take me out on a date."


	6. Chapter 6

_Prompt: Castle taking care of Beckett._

* * *

><p>Kate Beckett high on laughing gas is one of the most entertaining sights he's ever witnessed.<p>

She'd had a cavity, rooted deep in one of her molars - _that's what happens when you eat too many gummy bears, Beckett_ - and the dentist had knocked her out with the gas to numb her mouth without causing her pain. She definitely wasn't feeling any pain as they stumbled through his front door together.

"I'm starving," she announces, hanging on his shoulder as he drops his keys in the bowl on the end table. "_Casssle_."

"I know, love. But you can't eat anything for another few hours," he reasons softly, as he has for the last hour.

She sighs, loud and exaggerated, and teeters on her heels as she tried to break free of his grasp and head for the kitchen despite her doctor's orders. Castle tightens the arm around her waist and leads her to the couch instead, to safety, and she goes willingly, her body a loose, pliable thing.

The walk to the car from the dentist's office was difficult, the walk from the car to his lobby and then from the elevator to his loft was near disastrous. They'd almost tumbled to the ground twice.

Kate lacks her usual grace when she's on drugs.

He sits her down on the sofa and moves for the kitchen to grab her a bottle of water, but Kate catches the edge of his jacket with clumsy fingers before he can go far.

"Lay with me?" she asks, the words slurred and fumbling past her swollen lips. She looks so childlike, so vulnerable with her eyes so wide and hazy, and although it's amused him over the last hour, it's also made him a little protective over her, over her unsteady body and uninhibited emotions. He's not used to seeing Kate practically powerless and he doesn't like it, not when he's seen what the world can do to her.

Castle settles down next to her, holding her close to his chest when she curls up in his arms like she does after a difficult case, as if he's her refuge. He drops a kiss to her forehead and strokes his fingers through her hair, listening to her sigh against his neck.

"Hey, Castle," she whispers.

"Hmm?"

"Wanna make out?"

A burst of laughter escapes his lips and she pokes his shoulder in offense.

"I don't think we could manage that right now," he answers, still chuckling, and she growls, buries her face in his chest.

He's sure she's fallen asleep after only a few minutes, her breathing steady and her body slack, but then her fingers curl in the collar of his t-shirt and her nose bumps into his jaw as she maneuvers her head to stare up at him with bleary eyes.

"Tell me a story," she requests.

"A story?" he parrots with a smirk, watching her roll her eyes and then struggle to open once more.

"Love your stories, Cas-tle." He chuckles at the broken syllables of his name, her numb mouth unable to pronounce many words correctly, and she bats at his chest, curls her fingers in his shirt again. "Used to read them after mom's murder. Helped me sleep better."

He stills at that, blinks down at her in surprise.

"You read my books then?"

She nods, tucking her head beneath his chin, and inching into his lap. He hugs her to him, cups her ear in his hand and circles the porcelain shell with his thumb.

"Made me feel a little better too," she slurs, succumbing to the pull of sleep before he can stop it. "You-" She yawns. "Made me feel better."

She's gone before he can say anything else, before he can respond to this shocking revelation. He knew she was a fan, knew she loved his writing even if she refused to feed his ego with the admission, but he'd never known his books had ever meant much to her. Never would have guessed they'd helped her in any way. Especially not with the death of her mother.

Castle situates himself into the corner of the couch, snagging a throw blanket to drape over Kate as she snuggles against him. He buries his nose in her hair and plants one more kiss to her scalp.

"Love you, Kate."

She stirs for a second and he feels her hand pat his chest.

"You too, Castle. Love you."

He grins and settles in comfortably, spends the next two hours planning how exactly he's going to reveal this new information she's given him in her drug induced state.

But maybe, just maybe, he won't reveal it at all. Maybe he'll wait until she decides to tell him herself, without the help of laughing gas.

They don't keep secrets anymore, not since he put a ring on her finger, but he doesn't mind waiting for this one. Knowing she could find solace in his words is more than enough.


	7. Chapter 7

**Set anywhere between Dance With Death (4x18) and 47 Seconds (4x19)**

_Prompt: 'Holocene by Bon Iver is Kate's song to relax to; it helps her calm down when her PTSD gets the best of her. Unbeknownst to her, Castle is flicking through her iPod, finds it, and starts listening to it. Kate gets irrationally angry at him about it.'_

* * *

><p>"You want to grab a drink?" he asks, grabbing her coat from the back of her chair and holding it up for her. They just wrapped a case, a simple Jack shot Bill over Jill scenario that Kate and the boys had solved within the first 24 hours, but he'd hardly had time to really <em>see<em> her today. Aside from the brief moment in which he'd presented her with her morning coffee.

He knows he's getting greedy, taking every opportunity he can to spend time with her, to talk about more than case notes and murder suspects, but he can't help it. He loves Detective Beckett, loves working by her side and having her back in the field, but he's _in love_ with the woman underneath the armor as well.

The soft smile flirts at her lips, the subtle light in her eyes dancing as she slips her arms through the sleeves.

"I'd love to." He bounces on his toes in excitement as they start towards the elevators. "But do you mind if we stop by my place first?"

"Course not."

* * *

><p>In her apartment, she leaves him in the living room to change. Her bedroom door clicks shut and he takes a seat on her couch, absorbing the eccentric feel of her home and allowing the bohemian vibe of the place to relax him as it always does. He notices her iPod sitting on the coffee table and plucks it from the clean wood. He presses the home button, unlocks the screen with a swipe of his thumb, and is met with an album cover - the song she must have been listening to last, paused and ready to resume.<p>

Holocene by Bon Iver.

Huh. He's never heard of it, but just like the rest of her style, Beckett's music taste is a lot more widespread compared to his. He presses the play button and the music comes alive, a soft, soothing melody floating from the speaker of the device. There's melancholy in the sound, in the voice of the artist, pain and reassurance all swirled into one as the lyrics whirl around him.

The chorus has just begun when he hears the faint sound of footsteps, but he doesn't think to stop the music.

_And at once I knew,_

_I was not magnificent,_

"What the hell are you doing?"

The iPod is snatched from his hands, the calming song that had claimed his attention coming to an abrupt halt. Kate's standing over him in one of his favorite tops, the royal purple sweater that hugs her so perfectly and makes her eyes shine hazel. But in that moment her gaze is angry, colored dark brown with irritation and outrage, but he doesn't understand what he's done wrong.

"You can't just go looking through other people's stuff," she huffs, holding the iPod to her chest, like it's something sacred that he's managed to defile.

"I - I'm sorry," he stammers. "I didn't think you would mind. I wasn't trying to snoop, Beckett."

Kate pinches the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger and squeezes her eyes closed. Castle rises from the couch and approaches her with caution, tentatively settling his hands on her shoulders and exhaling in relief when she doesn't shove him away.

"I just - don't share that song," she murmurs, barely audible, but he hears her.

"Personal?" he assumes, circling his thumbs over the rounded bones beneath his fingers.

She nods, finally looks up at him. "It's - whenever the PTSD gets bad, when the panic attacks come, I listen to that song. Something about it…" She shrugs. "It calms me down, helps me breathe a little easier."

Oh, Kate. His heart clenches at the thought of her alone in her apartment, suffering through the unending trauma that continues to follow her, and having nothing more than a song to console her. But he isn't surprised that she's found a way to cope on her own.

He doesn't want to smother her, wouldn't dream of imposing on her independence, but he wishes she could let him be there for her.

"It's a beautiful song," he says and her eyes soften, gold and green bleeding into the rich brown of her irises, creating the sea of colors he loves to get lost in.

Kate takes a shaky breath and dislodges the iPod from the cove of her clutched hands against her chest, hovers her thumb over the play button.

"Kate," he says gently, taking a chance and laying his palm over the hollow of her cheek. "You don't have to."

Her lips spread into a smile, small and beautiful and just for him, and she leans into his hand before stepping forward, wrapping loose arms around his neck.

"I want to."

She presses the play button.

The sad loveliness of the song fills the air once more, ribbons around them as she starts to sway slowly in his arms.

_We smoked the screen to make i__t what it was to be,_

_Now to know it in my memory,_

Castle laces his arms around her waist as they dance together in the dimmed light of her apartment. Kate rests her head on his shoulder as her fingers twine in the fine hairs at the base of his skull, and he dips a kiss to her forehead, watching in delight as her cheeks rise with the grin that spreads over her lips.

He never went to many dances as a kid, never held a girl close or felt the intimate brush of her body against his as they swayed in harmony. Never knew the magic of being enclosed in a bubble of contentment like this.

But even if he would have attended any of those oh so important high school dances, he doesn't believe any moment of his past could have ever amounted to this. Not even close. Dancing with Kate Beckett in her living room to a song she's never shared with anyone else but him, placing new memories to the music, replacing the darkness of the old.

He couldn't ask for more.

_And at once I knew I was not magnificent,_

_High above the highway aisle,_

_Jagged vacance, thick with ice,_

_I could see for miles, miles, miles._

It's slow going, but the wall is crumbling down, and he's knee deep in rubble, but it's worth it. Moment's like these are worth every second he's spent waiting.


	8. Chapter 8

_Prompt: 'ABC (in real life) is making a Derrick Storm TV Series. This happens in Castle's universe.'_

* * *

><p><strong>Set in early 2016:<strong>

"But they didn't even follow the plot," Kate argues, shaking her head as the end credits roll by and the preview for the next episode appears on the television screen.

"I know," he sighs, retrieving another handful of popcorn from the bowl between them. "It was still pretty good though."

"They made Clara look like an idiot," she protests, vehement and far more offended than he ever would have expected.

He was hesitant to have Derrick Storm turned into a television series for this very reason. The show was well done - much better than _Heat Wave,_ that's for sure - and he'll always feel a sense of pride at seeing his own characters brought to life, but it's impossible to follow the book precisely. Especially in under 45 minutes.

"It's just a TV show," he reasons, trying to placate her, still not fully understanding the look of disdain and disappointment shadowing her features.

"But it's based on your books, Castle. It's supposed to do them justice, and this," she huffs, waving her hand at the television. "Didn't give your work half the credit it deserves."

Wow, she looks truly upset. A memory from a few years ago, back when they had that case involving her favorite television show, Nebula 9, flashes in his mind. The way the light had dimmed from her eyes when the characters she had looked up to as an adolescent shattered the illusion with their disappointing personalities.

He sometimes forgets that his books held that sort of importance to her, that they still do, and that seeing this television adaptation fall short of her expectations is somewhat crushing for her.

"Kate," he murmurs, curling the arm resting along the back of the couch around her shoulders and coaxing her into his side. "You watched the Nikki Heat movie, right?"

She scoffs. "Don't even get me started on that."

He chuckles and settles his chin atop her head. "My point is, that didn't change how much you enjoy the novels, right?"

She shakes her head against his chest and tucks her knees into his side, resting her hand over her stomach. He covers her fingers, twining them over the barely noticeable bump.

"Just consider this a different version of the stories you already know," he says, brushing his thumb over her knuckles. "And if you don't like this version, we can just not watch it. Besides, I have better ideas for how we can spend our time."

He feels her smirk against the side of his throat, dropping a kiss to the skin beneath his jaw before uncurling from his side and rising from the couch, pulling him with her.

"Show me an example," she grins, leading him through his office, towards the bedroom.

Fiction may have fallen short of their expectations tonight, but he doesn't mind. He has his wife in his arms, a growing piece of their family between them, and he's happy. So happy.

His reality exceeds the fictional world any day.


	9. Chapter 9

_Prompt (taken from the castlefanficprompts page): Meredith cancels on Alexis again, she goes down stairs to find Kate playing with her step baby sister and calling her mamas special girl and stuff like that, she goes back into her room and cries wishing her mother would have been like that_

* * *

><p>"No, I understand. Really." Alexis picks at the knee of her jeans, trying to keep her voice light as she reassures her mother once again as she goes on about her reasons for canceling.<p>

She's not upset. She's not. She had prepared herself for this to happen, she knows there's always a fifty percent chance that her mother will cancel on her for something or someone better. At least she called this time.

"Yeah, sure. Some other time," Alexis agrees, brushing her bangs back from her face and standing from her childhood bed. She had stopped by the loft for lunch with her dad, Kate, and the baby. She was supposed to meet her mother at the airport, but now…

Her mother offers one last exaggerated version of an apology and singsongs her goodbye, sounding not the least bit regretful. Alexis sighs and tucks the phone into her back pocket.

It's fine. She's fine. She's 22 years old, she has better things to do than sulk over her mother and a lifetime of broken promises.

Alexis trots down the stairs, taking a deep breath and plastering on a look of indifference before anyone can see her or the secret hurt she feels threatening to creep into her eyes. Both her grandmother and father are good actors, but she's not so bad herself. She's learned to hide hurt well.

Alexis hears the sound of Kate in the living room, talking and giggling to her baby sister on the couch. Alexis descends the last couple of steps, keeping quiet and inching closer before Kate can take notice of her presence. Her dad must be writing in his office, he'd complained about a nearing deadline while the three of them had sat at the dining room table earlier, but Kate has the day off from work and she's taking advantage of her time with their daughter.

Alexis smiles softly to herself as Kate tickles her sister's stomach, leaning over the lying baby to blow raspberries on her stomach, causing the tiny girl to squeal in delight.

Her impending graduation has kept her busy, but Alexis tries to visit at least once a week to see her sister. But with these visits comes an unexpected tinge of heartache that's been steadily growing for the last six months since Lucy was born. Watching Kate with the baby has always been something beautiful to her, shown her yet another side to the detective that she never thought she would see, but it also reminds her of something she's always yearned for but has never had. The overflowing love a mother has for her daughter.

"There's mommy's special girl," Alexis listens to her coo, lifting her head to smatter kisses over the baby's face, feathering her fingers over the silky tuft of hair atop her head and eliciting one of Lucy's adorable toothless smiles.

Alexis doesn't expect her eyes to burn, doesn't expect her throat to clog with tears, and she quickly turns on her heel, makes a silent dash back up the stairs.

She closes her bedroom door behind her and presses her back against the frame, tilting her head up and willing the pointless tears to recede. She and Kate have had their differences in the past, they haven't always seen eye to eye, but what she wouldn't give to have a mother who loved her like that.

The soft knock on the door startles her.

"Alexis?" Kate says quietly. "Can we talk?"

Alexis panics for a second, swipes beneath her eyes and checks her cheeks before she steps away from the door and eases it open. Kate offers her a small smile, one full of too much understanding. Either the older woman saw her before she could disappear up the stairs or she's using her detective skills to sense exactly what's wrong.

Probably both.

"Where's Lucy?" Alexis asks, noticing Kate's arms are bare and hanging at her sides for a change.

"With your dad. He needed a break anyway," she shrugs. "Are you heading to meet your mom soon?"

Alexis opens her mouth to answer, to casually brush off the fact that her mother dumped her for an acting gig yet again, but her lower lip starts to tremble and when she tries to answer, her voice doesn't come.

"Oh, Alexis," Kate murmurs, placing her hands on her shoulders and folding her into a hug.

She cries. Practically sobs against Kate's shoulder, harder than she has in years, and Kate holds her through it, strokes her hair and murmurs gentle words of empathy until Alexis can finally take a steady breath again.

"I'm sorry," she sniffs as she takes step back, feeling her cheeks burn with embarrassment. Her relationship with Kate has vastly improved over the last couple of years, but she's never been this open with her or anyone else aside from her dad or grandmother for that matter.

"Hey, no," Kate says, catching her hand and lowering her head to catch Alexis' gaze. "I get it. Really."

Alexis nods and realizes that Kate actually does understand, probably better than anyone else ever could.

She sometimes forgets that Kate lost her mother too.

Alexis nods and when Kate gives her another one of those comforting smiles, she smiles back, squeezing the fingers clasped around hers in appreciation. Her father's wife can't fill the role of mother for her, no one can, but she's been a good friend, a reliable confidant, and she's grateful for that.

"C'mon," Kate murmurs, tugging her towards the stairs. "Your dad makes these ridiculous faces at Lucy when he thinks no one's watching."

Alexis chuckles and follows Kate down the stairs.


	10. Chapter 10

_Prompt: 'Season 3 AU: After Beckett leaves with Josh at the precinct ("Punked") Esposito confronts her, telling her she's doing the exact same thing (parading boyfriends at the precinct) that drove Castle away during the summer.'_

* * *

><p>The elevator doors have just slid open, Josh's arm squeezes at her shoulder as he takes a step inside and she forces a smile for him while she begins to follow, but the quiet but clipped call of her name has her pausing.<p>

"Yo Beckett, you got a sec?"

Josh arches an eyebrow at her, gaze flickering between her and Esposito, but she merely pats his hand and promises it'll only be a second before slipping from underneath his arm and following Esposito towards the drink machine a few feet away.

"What's up?" she murmurs, feeling far too many pairs of eyes on her back.

Esposito crosses his arms and tilts his head at her, a familiar expression of _really?_ on his face, as if she knows she's done something wrong and is purposely evading the subject.

"You remember that talk we had before Castle left for the summer?"

Kate huffs and shakes her head.

_Why do you think he's been following you around all this time?_

How could she forget?

_The guy's done enough research to write 50 books._

"This is completely different."

"Is it? Because it looks pretty similar to me," Esposito muses, rocking back on his heels. "Castle hanging around for something that has nothing to do with books, you parading around another guy…"

"Since when are you on his side?" she questions, irritation over Esposito's sudden decision to lecture her growing at a rapid speed.

Esposito shrugs. "Just saying."

"Like I said," she states through gritted teeth. "This is different and it's not as if Castle's waiting around to whisk me off to the Hamptons anymore. He has Gina for that."

Her lips fall into an involuntary frown at the words, at the memory of Castle sauntering out of the precinct with his ex wife on his arm. Esposito offers her a sympathetic look, one that looks suspiciously similar to the one Lanie always gives her every time they discuss this particular subject.

She knows Esposito means well, but it isn't as if she had planned for Josh to show up here. She was supposed to be the one picking him up, but she wasn't going to feel bad about her… new interest (yeah, that works) coming inside her workplace to pick her up for a date. Even if it did hurt Castle's feelings.

"He broke up with her."

Her eyes snap up from the floor at that. "What?"

"He mentioned it today while we were in the break room. They broke up earlier in the summer," Esposito informs her, looking smug, but also a little regretful on her behalf. "He was going to ask you on a date after we closed this case."

Her heart plummets, deep into her stomach, and she has to lean against the wall as she wobbles slightly in her heels.

Castle was going to ask her on a date?

"Look, Beckett, I'm not trying to meddle in your life, but you know how our job is. I just don't want to see you miss out on something that could make you happy."

She glances up at her friend, her brother, sees him shift a little awkwardly at the rare display of concern for her and her best interests, and she realizes… he's right.

She feels Esposito tense next to her, but her brain is too busy running in circles to register the approaching footsteps. She startles at the hand on her shoulder, her head whipping around to find Josh watching her with impatience hinting in his eyes.

"Kate, are we leaving anytime soon?"

Her mouth feels dry as her gaze drifts over Josh's shoulder, back to the bullpen to see Castle staring at her, an anxious twitch causing his fingers to fidget at his side. By the look on his face, he knows exactly what Esposito told her and he looks terrified.

"Kate," Josh huffs and she shrugs his hand from her shoulder.

"Do you mind if we don't?" she replies, biting her lower lip as his brow furrows.

"You… want to have our date here?"

Esposito scoffs from behind her and she represses the urge to roll her eyes.

"Uh, no. I meant - just me. I have to stay here."

Understanding and a glimpse of annoyance flash in his eyes, but he nods his acceptance, takes a step back.

"I assume you won't be calling to reschedule?"

Josh is a good guy, a smart choice, a safe choice - she recognized that within the first few dates. She had sworn to herself that he would be the man who helped her move past the irrational heartache Castle had caused her over the summer, and deciding to dump him on impulse was a risk that scared her, left her vulnerable to the man still watching her from across the room, but she was growing so tired of playing it safe.

"I'm sorry," she says softly and Josh sighs, but reaches out, squeezes her arm.

"It was nice while it lasted. Good luck, Kate."

His hand falls away and then Josh is retreating to the elevator and Kate is forcing her legs to work before she can think better of it.

Ryan and Montgomery scatter from Castle's side as she comes closer, her determination growing with every stride.

"Beckett," he starts as soon as she reaches him, his voice a pitch higher than normal. "Whatever Esposito said, he-"

"C'mon Castle," she interrupts, snagging his fingers and tugging him towards the service stairs instead of the elevator, not wanting to take the chance of an awkward run in with the man she just turned away. "We're going on a date."

"I should be a professional matchmaker," Esposito sighs, watching from beside Ryan as Castle and Beckett disappear down the stairs.

Ryan bites back his laugh.

"Never knew you were such a romantic, Javi."

The wistful smile vanishes and Esposito's head swivels around to glare at his partner.

"Just wait until they get married. Who do you think they're going to want to be the best man?"

Ryan huffs, lightly shoves his shoulder. "You wish."

"I_ know."_

_"_Rather than planning a wedding," Montgomery announces, brushing past them to drop a bundle of files in the middle of their shared desks. "I'd get to work."

Ryan and Esposito groan, but their captain is smiling as he circles back to his office, the thought of his best detective and her shadow of a writer combined with marriage surprisingly pleasant.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Please note the rating change for this chapter.**

* * *

><p><em>Prompt: What if the kiss in 3x13 (knockdown) had escalated into more?<em>

* * *

><p>She's sucking on his tongue and using every ounce of diminishing willpower that she has not to grind down on the thigh pushed between her legs. The guard by the door isn't moving, still glancing to them from time to time, but she saw him waver when she and Castle were kissing, an eyebrow of intrigue arching, and she thinks if they can just gain a little more attention, go a little too far-<p>

"Kate," he gasps, groaning when she abandons his mouth and turns to his neck, laving her tongue over the pulsing skin beneath his jaw. She hates to admit it, but god does he taste good, he _feels_ good, better than she ever imagined. "Gotta stop."

"No," she growls, nipping hard at his jugular. They're up against the nearest wall she could push him into and she gasps when he spins her, presses her flat against the chilled concrete and grunts when her spine automatically arches for him. "We're close. He'll stop us soon."

"He better," Castle warns her as he leans in again, punishing the skin of her neck just as she did to his, marking the column of her throat with the heat of his tongue and the drag of his teeth, and she can't help but squirm and mewl against the drugging sensation of his mouth on her.

"More," she demands, hooking a leg at his thigh, stabbing her heel into his calf muscle and jerking his crotch against her and oh - oh, he's harder than she thought. "It - it has to look authentic," she gasps in explanation, but she doesn't know if he's listening as he takes a split second to study her face. She doesn't know what he sees, but it must be enough because he dives back in, takes her mouth and kisses her until she's moaning and rocking her lower body against him.

Her head falls back against the wall as his hands grab her hips, his grip bruising around her bones while he tries to slow the frantic roll of her lower body, guiding her into a calmer rhythm, a burn that is even more intense than before.

"Don't stop, don't stop, don't-" she's babbling, getting off on the hard press of Castle's body against hers, and she really hopes he's watching the guard like she told him to because all she can see is the bursting sparks of white light behind her eyelids.

His body has been a taut line of restraint since this little ruse of theirs made an escalation from kissing, but the wave of her body undulating against him eventually has him thrusting sharp, hitting her just where she needs, increasing the sinful friction sizzling between them, and she keens low in her throat as she tightens the arms around his shoulders, stabs her nails into his back.

"I want my mouth on you," she says, loud enough for the man only a few feet away to hear. Castle jerks to a stop, looking horrified under the lust clouding the dark blue of his eyes. "It'll - will work," she pants for him alone, but he shakes his head, an adamant 'no', and she growls at him, but at the feel of his hand slipping under her shirt she quiets.

"Castle," she breathes as the heat of his palm skims her ribs, ventures higher up to slide under her bra, cup a single breast and squeeze the taut peak of her nipple.

She chokes on another gasping breath as he leans in close again, crowding, towering over her, and traces his tongue along the shell of her ear.

"Too much?"

She shakes her head, forgetting for a shameful second about the boys they're trying to save, about the fact that she has a boyfriend, about everything except him and his mouth and his hands.

"Don't stop," she repeats, turning her head and stealing his lips once more, shoving her tongue in his mouth and memorizing every second and taste and sound she can evoke as she works her body against his.

She goes rigid when he teases the waistband of her slacks, toying with the button, but she bucks her hips after a moment of stillness, waits for him to slide the zipper down. She expects to be hoisted up, but he merely tightens the thigh already curled around his and slips his fingers down, down past the soaking black satin of her thong, down into the drenched heat of her core.

"Kate," he groans into her cheek, experimentally brushing a finger through the wetness of her folds, and she arcs forward, nearly sending them both tumbling.

His tongue in her mouth matches the rhythm of his fingers circling her clit and she's practically keening by the time he finally slides a finger inside of her.

"Fuck," she hisses, biting her own lip - or maybe his, she isn't sure - and crying out as he withdraws only to add another. She can already feel the lapping waves of an orgasm licking at her abdomen, blurring at her vision, and she buries her face in his neck, rocks hard against his hand and clenches her fingers in his hair.

"Let go, Kate, I've got you," he's murmuring over and over into her hair and she's on the verge of sobbing because it's so wrong, it's all so wrong, but she's never been this wound up with the scalding heat of pleasure before. She's never seen so many stars exploding behind her eyes as she falls.

The whole point of their act was to cause a distraction, she's been purposely loud since they started making out against the wall, but when she comes, she bites back her scream, releasing only a strangled whimper against his throat.

"Okay this has gone on way too long, you two are committing a disgusting act of public indecency and I-"

She has the guard knocked to the ground before he can finish. She's breathing heavy, gripping her gun hard to conceal her shaking hand, and she's afraid to look at Castle. But she sucks in a gulp of air, turns to see him wiping the sticky evidence of her on his pants.

Her mouth feels dry, words getting stuck, and she wishes more than ever that circumstances were different and they could go to her apartment, spent the entire night in her bed.

"Castle-"

"Let's go," he murmurs, eyes downcast as he strides past her, and she curls her fingers over her swollen lips, forces herself to focus as she follows after him.

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><p>Josh is at her apartment when she finally arrives home later that night. She doesn't have an explanation for the collection of deep purple bruises staining her neck. He doesn't ask, seems to already know. He leaves and she should feel guilty, hurt, but her thoughts are plagued by only one thing for the rest of the night.<p>

She dials Castle's number.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: The M rating definitely applies to this chapter. **

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><p><em>A continuation to chapter 11 (AU to 3x13, Knockdown)<em>

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><p>"Is everything okay?" he asks as soon as she opens the door to him. "Your message sounded kind of urgent."<p>

Kate shuts the door as soon as he's inside and proceeds to push him up against it, cupping his neck in her hands and surging up on her toes, fusing her lips to his, savoring the immediate rush of heat. It's only been a few hours since the last time she tasted him, but she's been craving him since the moment they parted.

Castle kisses her back, lips moving against hers out of instinct, but his hands grip her biceps, jerk her back.

"Beckett," he pants, his voice so low, a warning. "Where's Josh?"

"Gone. He saw these," she growls, flipping her hair back, exposing the colorful mural he made on her neck.

"I don't remember you complaining earlier," he snaps, an unexpected spark of anger in his eyes.

She arches her brow in response, grabs the hem of her own shirt and pulls it over her head. His gaze never leaves her, not for the soft fabric of the turtleneck fluttering through the air, nor the exposed planes of flesh now on display for him. He keeps the intense blues of his eyes locked with hers.

"I'm not complaining now."

His willpower falls apart before her eyes and then he's swooping in, confident and determined, holding her face in his hands as he slips his tongue past the weak barrier of her lips.

She gasps when his hands leave her cheeks to travel down the expanse of her exposed skin, brushing over the lace cups of her bra, skimming her sides, her abdomen, circling around to her back.

Her bra hits the ground, his large palms find her breasts, kneading, palming, pinching, and she mewls, loud and uninhibited, while she works on his belt. They're stumbling towards her bedroom - she thinks - but somehow get sidetracked by the dining table. The backs of her knees hit the polished edge of wood and Castle lifts her up, pushes between her parted knees, right against the burning center of her jeans where she needs him the most.

"Castle," she groans, abandoning his pants when his belt finally falls and shoving his jacket off instead, groping at the muscles of his back through the thin material of his dress shirt.

"Do you know how hard it was," he pants, his open mouth against her neck, migrating down, down to nip at her clavicle, down to paint the slope of a breast, circle one of her nipples with his tongue. "Not to drop to my knees when I felt how wet you were?"

She bites her lip, tangles her fingers in his hair as he goes lower, nipping the sensitive skin beneath her navel, smirking at the jump and clench of muscles beneath his lips.

He unbuttons her pants, jerks them down her legs, and she helps, lifting her hips and shoving at the waistband with one of her hands, pushing the drenched material of her thong down with them.

"I wanted to taste you."

"Please," she moans, the pressure between her legs practically painful as his thumbs circle her anklebones and his palms smooth up the path of each leg until he reaches the soft skin of her thighs. He cranes forward to kiss her mouth once before he gently eases her down, her naked back falling to the cool wood of the table, already causing her to arch with need. He hasn't even touched her yet and it's already too much.

He's still completely dressed when he leans over her, trailing fingers down the length of her body before spreading her legs, so in control, so different.

"You're beautiful," he says, just before he kneels between her thighs and touches his mouth to her clit.

She jerks off the table, cuts her nails into the wood beneath her as he sucks, _hard,_ and uses his tongue to thoroughly explore every inch of her. She registers his hands abandoning her knees, feels her thighs clench around his head and her ankles locking at his back as his teeth graze her swollen clit, his tongue lapping at her folds, every sensation a white-hot wave crashing over her until she can barely breathe, can barely get his name past her lips as she sobs.

Her head thumps against the table, but she doesn't feel it. Her hips are bucking against him, her entire body writhing uncontrollably despite the hands holding her down. The spring of pleasure deep in her abdomen is coiled so tightly, it doesn't take much more than the single thrust of his familiar fingers inside of her and the _sound _of him eating her out to have her gushing, crying her release as she flies apart.

His hands curl around her thighs, gently easing her quivering muscles from around him, dropping kisses to her skin that intensify the shivering aftershocks already wracking her frame.

"You left claw marks in your table," he murmurs and she forces her eyes open to see him towering over her, dusting his fingers over the expanse of wood near her hands in awe.

Her limbs are shaking, every piece of her body like jelly, but she forces herself up, snags her fingers in his shirt and tugs him as close as she can get, aligning their bodies and breathing through the rough tremor that clambers up her spine at the feel of him, hard and clothed and throbbing, pressed against her overly sensitized core.

"Bed." She swallows around the word, glancing from his eyes to his lips, unable to help herself from reaching up to kiss him, humming quietly at the prominent taste of herself in his mouth. "Please just take me to bed already."


	13. Chapter 13

****A/N: I love how much enthusiasm chapters 11 and 12 received, but part 3 hasn't yet come to existence... I hope you all can still enjoy the rest of the prompts to come. ****

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><p><em><em>What if instead of targeting Beckett at Montgomery's funeral the sniper targeted Castle to break Beckett.<em>_

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><p><p>

She was almost done with her speech, just a few lines left in the neatly written eulogy she had spent the last couple of days working so hard to perfect.

"And if you're very lucky, you find someone willing to stand with you."

Kate spares a look at Castle, hopes he can read the deeper meaning she'w placed for him behind her captain's words.

After the ceremony, after the ceremony they would talk. They would go back to her apartment, maybe his loft instead, and she would apologize for what she had said to him the other night. She would assure him that they were anything but over.

Kate takes a deep breath, pushes thoughts of later from her mind and tries to focus on the now, tries to honor Roy Montgomery the way he deserves.

"Our captain would want us to carry on the fight." She looks up to scan the crowd, to quell the tears that threatened to build at the edges of her eyelids, when she sees the flash. A distinct flash of light flickering behind he headstones.

Aimed at her partner.

"Castle!"

Kate jumps from her place at the podium, slamming into him at the exact moment the shot rings out through the air.

They tumble to the grass together, her hat flying off her head, the breath getting knocked out of her as she collides hard with him, and she pushes herself up as soon as she can feel the soil solid beneath her.

"Castle," she gasps, eyes darting to his face, heart sinking at the wide eyed panic consuming him. She lowers her gaze, searches frantically for an entry wound with her hands, finds it when she brushes a hand over his chest and her white gloves come away red. "No, Rick," she pleads, slipping a hand beneath his neck, forcing him to hold her gaze. "Don't you dare leave me," she whispers, pressing the other to the wound, trying to staunch the bleeding. Failing. "You can't do this. You have to stay. Castle."

His hand reaches for her, skims the side of her thigh before flopping back to the ground.

"Castle, please." She leans in closer, the panicked shouts falling away for just a moment as she hovers near his face. "Please, I love you. I love you, okay?"

His eyes flare bright for a moment, one corner of his mouth quirks, and he fades away.

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><p>Josh tried to make her leave when Castle's doctor and the plethora of nurses failed to remove her from the room. Josh, her boyfriend, should have been the one who could coax her away from Castle's bedside, but when he tells her she has to go, she only shakes her head.<p>

"I won't leave him," she protests, sitting back resolutely in her chair, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Yeah, believe me, I know," Josh mutters.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she snaps, but she already knows, they both know, and Josh only shakes his head at her.

"You know what, Kate? Fine. Stay as long as you like. But just for the record, you and I are done."

She doesn't feel sad, doesn't feel any sort of regret at the sudden loss of her relationship like she should. She simply nods her understanding to Josh as if they've just closed a business deal and he leaves the room without another word.

Kate sighs, scrapes a hand through her hair, wincing at the tangles and the dried blood clinging to a few unlucky strands. "Did you hear all of that, Castle?" she murmurs, leaning forward again, slipping her hand over his knuckles. "I'm single again. If you're interested."

She frowns to herself when even that doesn't get a response, chastises herself for being foolish enough to think her voice would be enough to bring him back. But he has to come back, she needs-

The door swings open again and she grits her teeth.

"I said I'm not leaving."

"I can see that, Detective Beckett."

Her eyes flash up to the older man in the doorway. She doesn't recognize him, but he isn't hospital staff.

She reaches for her hip, curses herself when she remembers she had to relinquish her weapon to come in here.

"Who are you?" she demands as the man shuts the door.

"A old friend of Montgomery's," he reveals. "And a new friend of yours. You can call me Smith."

She scoffs, knowing an alias when she hears one.

"Why are you here?"

"To offer a warning, maybe some advice," he muses, tilting his head at her and then glancing to Castle's unconscious form. "His blood is on your hands, you know."

Her heart stills, blood going cold.

"W-what?"

"Stop looking into your mother's murder and maybe they'll let him live."

He turns to go and she feels fury eradicate the chill in her bones, irritation at the clipped response overflowing, but yelling won't get her any answers and she swallows back her anger.

"Wait, please - what are you talking about?" she asks before the man can make his exit. "Why him? Why not me? Why-"

"The best way to break people is to take away what they love most," the man called Smith tells her, flicking his eyes between the two of them, and she tightens her fingers around Castle's. "This was only a warning. If you continue to investigate your mother's case, these people will be sure Mr. Castle dies like he was supposed to today and then they will finally kill you. It's your choice, Detective."

Smith slips out the door and she doesn't try to stop him. She couldn't if she wanted to. Her mind is at war, the importance of her life, of Castle's, waging against the need for justice for her mother.

God it's so unfair.

"I'll stop," she whispers, rising from the hard plastic of her seat to lean over Castle and sift her trembling fingers through his hair. "I'll - I'll stop and we'll be okay," she promises him even though he can't hear her.

"She wouldn't want this," she adds to herself, knowing her mother would never approve of her decision to put her life in danger, to risk his more than she already has. "I'm sorry, Castle." She doesn't try to catch the tears that finally fall. "I'm so sorry for letting this happen."

His fingers twitch on the bed, and she forces herself not to get excited, knows it's likely just a reaction to the drugs.

But then his eyes flash open.


End file.
